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	<description>Useless Science Blog</description>
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		<title>Acknowledgements</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I am profoundly grateful to my wife, Christina, for her divine tolerance and love, to my father Gary for my ability to think, to my mother Randi for my vocation, to Ron, the closest thing I’ve ever had to a mentor, to Don (for telling me that I was a writer), to my Companion (old [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/acknowledgements/</link>
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		<title>A Volunteer from the Audience</title>
		<description><![CDATA[“There is no invention to it, there is no trick, there is no fake; you simply lie down in a coffin and breathe quietly.” Harry Houdini For my next trick . . . a volunteer from the audience to be sawn in half or disappeared in a cabinet. Pick your poison. Please remove the largest [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/a-volunteer-from-the-audience/</link>
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		<title>The Family Business</title>
		<description><![CDATA[for CM “A young man in the dark am I But a wild old man in the light That can make a cat laugh, or Can touch by mother wit Things hid in their marrow bones . . .” W.B. Yeats, “The Wild Old Wicked Man” We have an old man who lives upstairs. It’s [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/the-family-business-2/</link>
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		<title>Revolt among the Cabbage Heads</title>
		<description><![CDATA[He lived in the belly of a golden furnace, and every morning he would collect his charred teeth and string them through their cavities into a necklace. Then he would speak at us all in whalespeak and reek conspicuously of sea water. We despised him for his ecumenical airs. “Am I not the sun?” he [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/revolt-among-the-cabbage-heads/</link>
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		<title>Slaying Humbaba</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Could you please not speak about his death, I said. Who is being spoken for? you said. I am speaking for him, I said. But, you said, it was the coarsest ocean that you damned him with. Well, I sputtered, the forest was filled with all that violent chirping, it was shimmying down the trees [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/slaying-humbaba/</link>
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		<title>For Every Action (Some Detritus on the Trinity)</title>
		<description><![CDATA[for Steven Pinker I. The evening news cleaves to the palate of the television screen and cringes off a gauze of static. A man watches. There are holes in the ozone layer. Irradiation of the planet. Ice melting, coasts will disappear, landmasses rewritten by water. There is a new cable channel devoted to floods. And [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/for-every-action-some-detritus-on-the-trinity/</link>
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		<title>A History of Bitings in the Domesticated Universe</title>
		<description><![CDATA[A dog bites a man. A man says, “A dog bites . . .” but a dog bites a man again before a man can say more. A dog stops biting a man as if to invite a man to speak. A man, as if on cue, says, “A dog bites . . .” but [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/a-history-of-bitings-in-the-domesticated-universe/</link>
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		<title>Self-Portrait in Canine</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I’ve trained myself to walk like a three-legged dog, but to be still for you, to imitate porcelain, reflect you back in white. You may preoccupy me with your shelf dust. I’ve trained my mouth to sound hesitation, near absence, the light tap tap tap of calloused paws against tile, invisible creeping, ghost around the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/self-portrait-in-canine/</link>
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		<title>Polka for the Recently Exhumed</title>
		<description><![CDATA[(from Frontier Accounts from the PoBiz Boomtowns) for Jack Spicer I. We’d all come wearing our cursory overalls, some to dress the dead, others, with tatty-handled grave shovels— jobless, destitute, each with his own ambiguous suspicion of the ancestors— victims of the seasons, all. Turned away at the soup lines We’d no other method of [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/polka-for-the-recently-exhumed/</link>
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		<title>Crucifixation</title>
		<description><![CDATA[A man threw himself on the ground face first. “I am gravity,” he said. The people passing by on their ways to places had to step over him. Soon they started taking him for granted. The man took this as further proof that he was indeed gravity. “People have always taken gravity for granted,” he [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://uselessscience.com/blog/2011/10/crucifixation/</link>
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